Corona Confusion, Contradictions and Pure C*ck Ups: A VENT

From the left, to the right, to the people that couldn’t care less about politics, there is a feeling we’re all a bit miffed. Last week, the ‘Stay Alert’ message was leaked to the press and thus followed an eruption of confusion that was perhaps best demonstrated by the reactions on Channel 4’s Gogglebox.

Retrieved from Facebook

As if this wet attempt at clear messaging wasn’t enough to grind our gears, it has become clear that Boris Johnson’s plan, for protecting teachers and children, is as baseless as the message ‘stay alert’. Both a SAGE committee of scientists and the British Medical Association have said Johnson’s plan to send select year groups back to school on 1st June is not adequate. Something that makes this situation even more incomprehensible is the fact that Labour Party politicians, yes the supposed party of workers, are refusing to take the side of the National Education Union on their five tests proposal – instead, Labour peer, Andrew Adonis and Barry Sheerman MP berate the teachers for standing up for themselves.


Just as we were reaching our wits end, The Guardian and The Daily Mail broke the story that Johnson’s chief advisor, the charity shop nightmare, Dominic Cummings and co had only gone and broke lockdown rules by travelling almost 300 miles from London to Durham, with severe symptoms of coronavirus, to drop off their toddler with the grandparents for childcare. Wait. That doesn’t make sense. How do you drive 300 miles with the kind of severe coronavirus symptoms that make your wife re-connect with God?

Yes, the likes of Tory MPs and the BBC’s political editor, Laura Kuenssberg, are asking the public to believe that they were too ill to look after their child but well enough to drive almost 300 miles. Is this extraordinary ability a symptom of coronavirus perhaps?

If you are finding these successive events in the timeline of the UK coronavirus lock down a bit unfathomable, do not worry, you are not alone. I guess there might be one useful message… Stay home. Join a trade union. Save lives.

By Ellie Stainforth Mallison

Liberal Arts with Geography student at the University of Nottingham.

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